“I don’t know how to do the exercises.” “People will watch me and think I don’t belong there.” “I don’t want to be judged. I just want to get some exercise and feel better.” Many sedentary individuals share sentiments like these when considering taking steps to start getting healthier by using a gym; however, people who are unhappy with their physical fitness and new to the gym environment frequently let their imagination override their logical thinking. As a result, something that should be positive—like exercise and self-improvement—become tainted and anxiety-ridden. This conundrum can even be bad enough to prevent someone from taking the initiative to get in the gym and start bettering themselves.
You’re not weak or stupid if you feel this way—you’re normal.
Keep in mind that no one is at a gym because they’re perfectly happy with their body—they’re there because they admit they’re not perfect and want to improve. When you go to a gym, you might feel like all eyes are on you, but most people just want to work out and then go home; they’re too focused on their lives to be watching you. The small percentage of people who do judge aren’t worth your concern or thought anyway—they’re the adult equivalent of the school yard bully who can’t handle their own problems, so they pick on others.
Realizing these facts will reduce (but not eliminate) the voice of anxiety in your head. It’s normal to feel uncomfortable getting into a new activity and environment where uncertainty is everywhere. There are gyms that are dirty, have an uncaring staff, and members who are bullies. These toxic gym environments are the exception, not the norm. Most gyms have adequate staff with gym members who are nice, want to get healthier themselves, and are usually willing to help you.
I recommend choosing one of the following methods to mitigate your worries and ensure you find a gym with a healthy environment:
1. Find a gym buddy.
You’re not alone—you almost certainly have a friend who loves to work out and wants to share that passion with you. They’re going to be familiar and empathetic to your concerns and worries. At the bare minimum, they can point you to a gym they’ve been to with a positive gym environment.
2. Research gyms online.
A gym’s website and social media channels will show what kind of staff are employed and what gym-goers they allow. Look specifically for photos; if the members are similar to you in size, shape, age, etc., you’re more likely to feel at-home there. It has been my experience that gyms owned by a family or single person are generally more principled and compassionate than larger, chain gyms, but I have also had positive experiences at chains.
3. Call the gym and get a tour.
Go in just for a tour to start—nothing more. This will make the space feel more approachable while allowing you to see how clean the gym is, who its members are, and what the staff are like. I once visited a Planet Fitness location for a tour and left feeling judged and unwelcome. I knew I wasn’t going to like it there and so I found a different gym where I felt far more welcome.
4. Attend a free workout/group session.
This is the step up from a tour. You’ll get some experience and education on how to perform exercise technique. You’ll also better understand the gym, its members, and its staff. Many gyms offer a free session for either open gym or a group workout, and I highly recommend you call the gym you’re investigating to see if they offer that.
5. Hire a personal trainer to get you set up.
Many gyms have personal trainers that should know how to teach exercises correctly, understand your goals, and set up a program to achieve those goals. It may be a good idea to hire a personal trainer for a few sessions or even a full month of sessions to learn the movements correctly and have a plan to continue on your own. At my gym, Blackmetal Strength Training, I offer a one-month trial. Many of my new clients tell me up front they want to do a trial, because they want to get the initial strength improvements, learn the exercises, and get a plan ready for when the trial is complete. I think this is a great way to get started on the right foot.
It’s important to make sure the personal trainer you hire is knowledgeable, keeps your goals at the front of their mind, and is not judgmental of you. To determine the quality of a potential personal trainer, check out this article from my website.
Don’t feel like you have to immediately show up on day one and start working out on your own. The common theme in the above methods is taking an intermediate step between doing nothing and attending the gym regularly. There are many options to intelligently prepare to start training—you wouldn’t start investing in your 401k without preparing first, and your physical body is no different. At the same time, while it’s good sense to do some research prior to getting started, you also shouldn’t let it paralyze you. You’re never going to be perfectly comfortable getting into a gym until you get in one, so you may as well shed your anxiety as best you can and get on with it.
